“McGough: I'm sorry. I'm afraid I've caught poetry. Mr Bones: Oh really? Well, don't worry, sir - I used to suffer from short stories.McGough: Really? When?Mr Bones: Oh, once upon a time ...”

“I thought we used to kill rats?" he said, as if he wasn't quite certain anymore."Yes, but you see, sir, this is the future," said Maurice."Is it?" said Mr. Schlummer. "Really? I always wondered when the future was going to happen. Oh, well. Cats talk now, too? Well done! Got to move with the, mm, the...things that move, obviously. Wake me up when they bring the tea in.”

“Experience is the best teacher I've ever had. I'm sorry, Mr. Sortz, but it's true.”

“Oh, Mr Norrell! Such a noodle I am upon occasion!”

“It's very soon done, sir, isn't it?' inquired Mr. Folair of the collector, leaning over the table to address him.What is soon done, sir?' returned Mr. Lillyvick.The tying up, the fixing oneself with a wife,' replied Mr. Folair. 'It don't take long, does it?'No, sir,' replied Mr. Lillyvick, colouring. 'It does not take long. And what then, sir?'Oh! nothing,' said the actor. 'It don't take a man long to hang himself, either, eh? Ha, ha!”

“I used to be afraid of failing at something that really mattered to me, but now I'm more afraid of succeeding at things that don't matter.”