“I avoided any theme parks or museums where the employees dressed true to period. Complete nightmare. I also spent a lot of time trying not to touch people.Unless they were wearing a hoop skirt. And they were standing in my way.”

“It wasn’t until I’d walked halfway across the parking lot that I realized: 1. I wasn’t wearing shoes. A. Or a shirt. 2. I didn’t bring my keys                       A. Or anything really. 3. I’d just left a complete stranger in my apartment.                       A. Naked.Whoever said one-night stands were supposed to be simple with no strings attached had clearly never met the disaster that was me.”

“This place is packed," Vee complained. "Where am I supposed to park?" She steered down an alley and slowed to a stop behind a bookstore. "This looks good. Lots of parking back here.""The sign says employee parking only." "How are they going to know that we aren't employees? The Neon blends right in. All these cars speak low class.""The sign says violators will be towed.""They just say that to scare people like you and me away. It's an empty threat. Nothing to worry about.".......Vee came to a halt. "What is THAT?"We were standing in the parking lot behind the bookstore, a few feet from the Neon, and we were staring at a large piece of metal attached to the left rear tire. "I think it's a car boot," I said."I can see that. What's it doing on my car?""I guess when they say all violators will be towed, they mean it.”

“I like to hike in state parks, but one thing I can’t stand is pants. So I don’t wear any. My wallet is tube shaped. Can you guess where I keep it?”

“There is no way I’m going out in public like this!”It seemed while I was being tormented at the salon, Bones had been out shopping. I didn’t ask where he got the money from, images of old folks with their necks bleeding and their wallets missing dancing in my head. There were boots, earrings, push-up bras, skirts, and something he swore to me were dresses but only looked like pieces of dresses.”

“I parked in front of the Field Museum under a NO PARKING sign. There were a couple of actual spots I could have used, but the drive was even closer. Besides, I found it aesthetically satisfying to defy municipal code.”