“Well, you're not [fat]. You have, like, the ideal balance of fat and muscle. ...If I were a cannibal, I'd eat you.”

“Forget Ryan,' Heidi said dismissively. 'He's a tool.''I thought you liked him!''I did--until I saw how little convincing he needed from me to cheat on you. And then I realized, Ryan Dano is a tool.”

“When you believe in something, stand up for it, even if everyone is sitting.”

“If my mother were a bumper sticker, she would read THAT'S NOT APPROPRIATE. Taylor's mom would read WHY THE F*** NOT?”

“When you see a small change in your life it means its a huge change in personality and your trait”

“No matter what those sex-ed teachers say about how great condoms are, there's not a condom in the world to protect you from heartbreak.”

“Hey, God made us sexual creatures. If he wanted teenagers to wait that long, he would have made puberty start at twenty-five.”