“I'm tired of eating your family's lousy, tasteless recipes," Dad said."Tasteless recipes? My grandmother's rolling in her grave!""It's from indigestion.”

“Your people eat dry and tasteless flesh but it is off plates as smooth as ivory and as round as the sun.”

“In my South, the most treasured things passed down from generation to generation are the family recipes.”

“if god had intended us to follow recipes, He wouldn't have given us grandmothers.”

“I want to write the world’s worst cookbook, which I’ll title: “The World’s Worst Cookbook.” It’ll feature recipes from “Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwich” (peanut butter, jelly, and bread), to “Roasted Roadkill and Hitchhiker’s Surprise” (this recipe is a secret concoction handed down from my great grandfather to my grandfather, who told it to my dad just before he ran him over).
”

“I hate the notion of a secret recipe. Recipes are by nature derivative and meant to be shared - that is how they improve, are changed, how new ideas are formed. To stop a recipe in it's tracks, to label it "secret" just seems mean.”