“Because, Jack, you volunteered to be taken down into eternal torment in place of her. This is the absolute minimum (unless I'm mistaken) that any female requires from her man.”
“You don’t deserve to end up in a place of eternal torment because you love someone else.”
“Why do you have a cigarette lighter in your glove compartment?" her husband, Jack, asked her. "I'm bored with knitting. I've taken up arson”
“The greatest weapon any warrior can carry into battle is absolute certainty of her eternal soul.”
“When you take a woman away from her man, what you get is a woman who can be taken away from her man.”
“Wait until you see what I bought," Tina gushed with a female's mistaken belief that a man was ever interested in what came out of a shopping bag unless it had to do with lingerie, auto parts, or sporting goods.”