“Readers of this memo will be disappointed to know that Bong-Bong Gad (sic), designer/owner/driver/proprietor of the vehicle, anticipated the inevitable "there but for THE GRACE OF GOD go I" witticism by unloading same on Yours Truly while we were still shaking hands (Filipinos go in for long handshakes, and the first party to initiate termination of a handshake—usually the non-Filipino—is invariably left with a nagging feeling that he is a shithead)”

“She won't reveal your secret handshake.""It's not my handshake I'm worried about.""Pretend it is.Because as far as I'm concerned,thats all the two of you do. Shake hands.Even if I see you kissing? In my head,I'm going to tell myself that you're shaking hands.”

“Truly the Filipino rises to his finest self during trying times, the more trying the times, the finer the rising. Or it is in times of disaster that the Filipino ceases to be a disaster, thinking of others first before self. ”

“This is the difference between the Spanish advent and the American; that the technical revolution provoked by the first produced the Filipino, while the cultural upheaval provoked by the second merely helped us to become more aware of this Filipinoness.”

“Before 1521 we could have been anything and everything not Filipino; after 1565 we can be nothing but Filipino.”

“Their handshake looked, for the first split-second he looked, like C.T. was jacking off and the little girl was going Sieg Heil.”