“Has anybody ever written a horror pop-up book? The center of the book pops up and opens the gate to the elder gods. Of course you'll want to shrink wrap these books because you want people to buy them before they get sucked into another dimension.”

“If a book falls in the woods and nobody read it, was it ever written?”

“A great book is a thing of mystery and beauty; it has the power to move you.”

“You ever drive up to the pharmacy window and they ask you, "Can I have your phone number?"Sure all I get on it anymore are political calls, and people doing polls. Maybe it's difficult for people that work at pharmacy drive up windows to get phones.”

“I tried to walk a mile in a man's shoes once. I ended up running most of the way!! Seems he wanted them back..”

“How many of you knew what the Thomas A Swift Electric Rifle was? An idea in the book years ago, and now who hasn't heard of a T.A.S.E.R.”

“If I were a candy bar I’d want to be a snicker, because then I’d have the last laugh!!”