“How you doing at 26 Fed?" “I’m growing and learning, meeting new challenges with confidence and enthusiasm while developing good work ethics and people skills.” “I’m surprised they haven’t fired your ass.” “Me too.”

“Detective Ramos confided in me, 'If something happens to you on my watch my ass is O-U-T.' 'How do you think I’d feel? D-E-A-D.”

“What these people were trying to create or re-create here in this new world is beyond me. I can't put myself in their minds or their hearts, but I can sympathize with their struggle for an identity, with their puzzlement, which has troubled Americans from the very beginning - Who are we, where do we fit in, where are we going?”

“I want to be back to work next week.'Let’s get you home first. I need to evaluate the extent of your mental impairment.' She tried to flash me the peace sign, but in her weakend condition, she only managed to raise her middle finger.”

“I enjoy the presence of a woman in the house for brief periods of time. They fall into two categories: the organizers and the slobs. There’s probably a third category—the naggers, who try to get you to do things, but I’ve never run into one of those. Oddly, I have no preference regarding oganizers or slobs, as long as they don’t try to pick my clothes for me. Basically, all women are nurturers and healers, and all men are mental patients to varying degrees. It works fine if people stick to their fated roles. But nobody does.”

“I tried to picture a bunch of guys in blue suits running around a beachside neighborhood, knocking on doors and flashing Fed creds. That should cause a stampede of illegal aliens heading south.”

“The meaning of life has not much to do with good and evil, right and wrong, duty, honor, country, or any of that.It has to do with cutting the right deal.”