“Never argue with a fool, people might not notice the difference”

“Though I drive in the valley of the shadow of death I fear no hijackers, but another fuel increase.”

“It was funny that you know someone for years but still discover something you never noticed before.”

“In another time and place, she might have felt differently, but thinking along those lines was pointless now.”

“It's funny, but have you ever noticed that the more special something is, the more people seem to take it for granted? It's like they think it won't ever change. Just like this house here. All it ever needed was a little attention, and it would never have ended up like this in the first place.”

“Stick two different people with two different sets of expectations under one roof and it ain't always going to be shrimp and grits on Easter.”

“I've come to understand that arguing with [my wife] about it has never solved anything. So instead of denying it, I've learned to take her hands, look her in the eyes, and respond with those three magic words every woman wants to hear:"You're right, sweetheart.”