“What went wrong? Nothing and everything.”

“One has so many more opinions about what has gone wrong than about what is perfect.”

“Look at all the things that can go wrong for men. There’s the nothing-happening-at-all problem, the too-much-happening-too-soon problem, the dismal-droop-after-a-promising-beginning problem; there’s the size-doesn’t-matter-except-in-my-case problem, the failing-to-deliver-the-goods problem…and what do women have to worry about? A handful of cellulite? Join the club. A spot of I-wonder-how-I-rank? Ditto.”

“Yes, yes, I know all the jokes. What else could I have expected at Highbury? But I went to Chelsea and to Tottenham and to Rangers, and saw the same thing: that the natural state of a football fan is bitter disappointment, no matter what the score.”

“…I've had a bad week."What's happened?"Nothing's happened. I've had a bad week in my head, is all.”

“It was hopeless, life, really. It was set up all wrong.”

“Maybe nobody went to see the Rolling Stones here in 1964,' said Ros. 'The dead shark was just too much fun.”