“I knew it was a terrible idea. We were supposed to be leaving our past behind us, not fully embracing it. But she was a part of my past that I wanted to hold onto. She was my only reminder of Tommy, my only remaining connection. I couldn’t let that die, not yet.”

“My past is trying to catch up to me and I must continue run from it. It's the only way I can live.”

“I really need to remember to block my thoughts.""Oh, come on," he pulled me closer towards him. "Why are you so scared?""Because the second that I let this conversation happen, I'll be letting my walls down. No matter what answer you give me, you'll have some sort of power over me, and I don't want that." I pushed past him, plopping down on the bed, not bothering to remove my boots.I could feel the mattress sink beside me. Ian ran his fingers through my hair. "Come here," he spoke softly. "Please." I pushed myself into a sitting position, and moved closer to him, leaning my head on Ian's shoulder. "I like this, a lot. It feels nice." Ian lifted my chin so that I was forced to look directly at him, and then he leaned in to kiss me.”

“He looked up at me without saying a word. I tried to hold it together but I could feel myself breaking as I fell to the floor, my face in my hands – tears flowing down my cheeks. For the first time in a while I felt like I was truly losing a hold of myself.”

“Just as I allowed them to live in my mind, I allowed them to die.”

“I closed my eyes, seeking a moment of peace but finding none. Behind my eyelids, an entirely new nightmare was waiting. This wasn’t another haunting memory. This was a new form of torture.”

“I walked slowly, my eyes focused on the gravel beneath me. I didn’t know where I was going, not that I cared. I just needed to get away. Soon enough, I’d find my way home. I had to believe that. There was a loud crackling noise in the sky as the thunder rolled through the clouds. I threw my head back, admiring the storm above. The sky was dark with flashes of white sparking throughout with each bolt of lightening following behind the thunder. It was beautiful. “After the storm, you will find peace.” I smiled as the sound boomed through the quiet neighborhood. And in that moment I felt at one with the storm as the pain inside of me slowly began to seep out.”