“Don't worry about me babe. I've seen so many backs walking away from me that this is old hat," he said, shrugging like this wasn't killing him like it was me. "Say it," he said, his voice shaking.”

“But, Luce, I need you to promise me something," he said, his face wrinkling. "If I ever mess things up again, whether it's a misunderstanding, or shit luck, or I just do what I was created to do and screw everything up," he paused, exhaling, "I want you to promise me you'll leave. Drop me like a bad habit and don't look back because god knows, it can't be me that walks away since I'm incapable of it.”

“What are you doing here, Luce?" he asked, studying me. "Watching you play," I answered, knowing it wasan't one he'd accept. "Yeah," he said, making a face. "That's not going to work for me." Of course it wasn't. "You know why," I added with a whisper. "I need to hear you say it," he said, swallowing. "I've gone too many days without hearing it." Sighing, I closed my eyes. "I love you," I said, knowing it was the truth and that it didn't change anything. "And I missed you." "Yeah," he said, "me too.”

“I'll try," he said, stretching his neck. "She's beautiful girl, Ryder. You're a lucky man." "Don't tell me what I have like I don't know it," Jude said, his arms stiffening.”

“Luce," he said at last, his voice soft. "what do you want me to do?" He paused, waiting for my response, but I wasn't sure what he was asking, so no response came. "Please, just tell me," he continued. "Tell me what you want me to say, and do, when it comes to Adriana or any other girl that looks my way, and I'll do it. You want me to fire a spit wad between their eyes? So be it. You want me to flip them off any time any one of them looks my way? You got it. You want me to poke my eyes out so I can't see another one of their suggestive smiles again?" he trailed on, half of his face squishing together. "Well, that would suck, but I'd do it. For you." Cradling my face in his hands again, he leaned forward so his eyes were staring into mine from half a foot away. "Just tell me, baby. What do you want me to do?”

“Why did you leave me, Elle? Why did you sneak away from me in the middle of the night while I was asleep like you were ashamed of me and what we'd done?" He kept his voice controlled, but I could hear the edge in it. "Why were you so cruel?”

“I also knew you wouldn’t stop your staring until you learned the cold, hard truth. So, consider yourself warned. I might not be the kind of guy that reads textbooks at the beach,” he said, glancing back at my open book, “but I’m smart enough to know girls like you should stay away from guys like me. So stay away.”