“A man is a penis-wrinkle when calling him a dickhead would be a compliment.”

“I love you. I never stopped loving you. These past years have been empty without you. The weekend you spent with me made me realize just how much you mean to me.”

“The bad things in life open your eyes to the good things you weren’t paying attention to before.”

“Whip ‘em out boys. We’ll measure them right here and now.”

“Bad things open your eyes to the good things you weren’t paying attention to before.”

“You can never replace someone you love like that. Eventually the memories won’t be so hard on you. With time, the memories will make you smile and you will be grateful for having them.”

“You left me over college tuition? Seriously? You left me broken and crying over money?”