“You look as if you have bitten into a turd.”
“Do you have troll turds in your ears?”
“I know you have the patience of a rapidly decomposing turd.”
“Believe me, Athelstan, you can wrap a dog's turd in a cloth of gold but it remains a dog's turd.”
“That man is such a damn turd monkey." "Grandma!" I said. "Oh, Zoeybird, did I call your mother's husband a damn turd monkey out loud?" "Yes, Grandma, you did." She looked at me, her dark eyes sparkling. "Good.”
“You are but a hard turd in the ass of my journey.”