“JACKThat is nonsense. If I marry a charming girl like Gwendolen, and she is the only girl I ever saw in my life that I would marry, I certainly won't want to know Bunbury.ALGERNONThen your wife will. You don't seem to realize, that in married life three is company and two is none.JACKThat, my dear young friend, is the theory that the corrupt French Drama has been propounding for the last fifty years.ALGERNONYes; and that the happy English home has proved in half the time.”

“But don't you think one can be happy when on is married?Perfectly happy. But the happiness of a married man, my dear Gerald, depends on the people he has not married.But if one is in love?One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.”

“You seem to forget that I am married, and the one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties.”

“Would you like to know the great drama of my life? It is that I have put my genius into my life...I have put only my talent into my works.”

“The happiness of a married man depends on the people he has not married.”

“Girls never marry the men they flirt with. Girls don't think it right.”

“Me, sir! What has it to do with me? You can hardly imagine that I and Lord Bracknell would dream of allowing our only daughter - a girl brought up with the utmost care - to marry into a cloak-room, and form an alliance with a parcel? Good morning, Mr. Worthing!”