“The way I see it, you should live everyday like its your birthday”

“Anyone who knows me, should learn to know me again;For I am like the Moon,you will see me with new face everyday.”

“I know it’s not your birthday, but would you like some birthday dick? It’s on sale today.”

“I consider seeing my 30th birthday an accomplishment. You know, not many midgets live to be this tall.”

“That should be your town motto. It's all I ever hear. Like: New Hampshire, Live Free or Die. It should be: Despair, You Need To Leave Now.”

“Lorie darlin', life in San Francisco, you see, is still just life. If you want any one thing too badly, it's likely to turn out to be a disappointment. The only healthy way to live life is to learn to like all the little everyday things, like a sip of good whiskey in the evening, a soft bed, a glass of buttermilk, or a feisty gentleman like myself.”