“John the Skrull: You say you've taken magic? Well all right, lads, all right. I could do the "Spartacus" thing, change into one of you, get lost among you. Live for five more minutes. But you know what? I'm not going to die looking like you! I don't want to be one of the fascists who made my people into morons! Who took something beautiful like Excalibur here and made it into just.. a.. bit of metal.”

“John the Skrull: (as Merlyn) "Here, listen. It's me, Merlyn, the magic man. There's no need for all this conflict, like. I command you to--"Tink: "Suck my tits, you fairy fuckers!"John the Skrull: "I was going to say 'give peace a chance'...”

“Wisdom: Mate, we're up to our necks in Skrulls! But we remembered the treaty: mutual protection. Here we are! Now, I've lost a couple of people I care about in quick succession, and I am taking no more bollocks from you. I've got this voice in my head, it's half Gandalf and half Mr. Kipling. Who is that?!Oberon: A VOICE?! YOU MUST NOT FOLLOW IT! IT'S THE MAD ONE, THE DEMON WHO KILLED HIS OWN CHILD AND LED EVERYONE TO DESTRUCTION! THE HIGHER EVOLUTIONARIES OF ALL THE WORLDS HAVE ONLY JUST SUCCEEDED IN CONFINING HIM TO THE DARK REALMS!Wisdom: Oh. Right. Him. Well, I'm gonna stop following that voice then. Obviously.”

“(The Skrull Beatles discuss their future.)"So when this is all over, are we still gonna be the Skrull Beatles then?""I quite fancy being the Skrull Monkees for a bit.""The dialogue's easier.""As long as I get to be Peter Tork.”

“Captain Midlands: "I met the real you once."John (Lennon) the Skrull: "You're meeting the real me now."Captain Midlands: "I told him to get his bleedin' hair cut.”

“Rumpty!" he muttered, which was very rude if you were one of the few people in the universe who understood what it meant.”

“I liked sports real well myself. And when I was about thirteen, I thought I knew why. I looked at it this way. God put you in a body, and He made that body subject to a lot of natural laws, you know? Like gravity and stuff. You see, Doc, I was brought up very religious, and I believed in God. And I believed in a soul. And I got to thinking that maybe the soul was like a prisoner in the body. Maybe the soul was too big for the body and was always trying to get out. And sports was - well, according to natural laws, you should only be able to run so fast, right? I mean, you get your legs working, you get your muscles churning as fast as they can go, you take into account the wind against you, stuff like that, all natural and scientific, and then you know just how fast you can go. You see? But me, I figured that there was something inside you, inside your soul, that could make you go just a little bit faster. Just a little bit faster, and it didn't have anything to do with muscles or nature or anything. It was your soul doing it. And when your soul made you go just that little bit faster, well then, for that moment, you were free. Does that make any sense?”