“Amelia Bedelia," said Mrs. Rogers,"Christmas is just around the corner.""It is?" said Amelia Bedelia. "Which corner?"Mrs. Rogers lauhged and said,"I mean tomorrow is Christmas Day.""I know that," said Amelia Bedelia.”

“The door opened."We're here," said Mrs. Rogers.Aunt Myra came in."Now!" said Amelia Bedelia."Greetings, greetings, greetings,"said the three children."What's that about?" said Mrs. Rogers."You said to greet Aunt Myra with Carols," said Amelia Bedelia."Here's Carol Lee, Carol Green, and Carol Lake.""What lovely Carols," said Aunt Myra."Thank you.”

“Boys,” said Amelia as she and Patrick stepped forward with the last gift, “Can you never give anyone anything useful?” At the same time Danny and Mason broke out into grins and said, “But those are useful.” Amelia shook her head, her blond curls cascading beautifully around her.”

“It is our honor," Amelia said, and it was the weirdest thing-it sounded like she really meant it. People don't often say exactly what they really mean.”

“Men are incomprehensible assholes," I said to Amelia. "NO shit," she said. "When I was searching for Bob today, I found a female cat in the woods with kittens. And guess what? They were all black-and-white.”

“I'm not sure what it means."Grace frowned. "I don't think I do either.""It sounds bad, though.""Sodding bad." Grace said with a smile, and she patted Amelia's hand.Amelia sighed. "A dammed shame."We are repeating ourselves." Grace pointed out."I know." Amelia said, but with a fair bit of feeling. "But whose fault is ut? Not ours. We've been far too sheltered.""Now that," Grace announced with a flair, "really is a dammed shame!""A bloody inconvenience, if you ask me.”