“Sometimes its good to come back when you least expect to.”

“The Worst part of acting like a jerk isn't when you're doing it. Its when you realize you were.”

“Sometimes when it looks like I'm deep in thought I'm just trying not to have a conversation with people.”

“Girls are like apples...the best ones are at the top of the trees. The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples that are on the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think there is something wrong with them, when, in reality, they are amazing. They just have to wait for the right boy to come along, the one who's brave enough to climb all the way to the top of the tree...”

“These jeans looked so good on me when I looked in the mirror I wanted to fuck myself.”

“(before playing Headfirst Slide Into Cooperstown On A Bad Bet) I couldn't really come up with a short way to sum up this song, but I was watching the movie 'Adaptation' the other day and this sort of sums it up in my head. You are not who loves you. You are who you love. Always remember that.”

“We're just like a movie based on a book-- almost, but not quite as good.”