“When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.”

“I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.”

“I was trying so hard to be what everyone wanted me to be, and yet every time I looked around, I was failing.”

“I know I am God because when I pray to him I find I'm talking to myself.”

“How do you know when you're God?" "When I pray to him I find I am talking to myself.”

“The student asks: If my redstone necklace had every view of every veil that ever brightened, would I be wise? The master answers: If I had a thousand pieces of a priceless vase, would I be rich?”

“One day when I was praying, it suddenly occurred to me thatI was talking to myself.”