“What's this?" Dan said, pointing to a funny squiggly formation. Uh, an M," said Nellie. "Or if you look at it the other way, a W. Or sideways, kind of S-ish..."Maybe it's palm trees," Dan said. "Like in the movie It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World. You know? No? These guys need to find hidden money, and the only clue they have is it's under a big W? And no one sees what it means-but then, near the end of the movie, there's this grove of four palm trees rising up in the shape of... you-know-what! Classic!"Amy, Alistair, Natalie, Ian and Nellie all looked at him blankly.There is no W in the Korean language," Alistair replied. "Or palm trees in Korea. I might be maple trees..."Mrrp," said Saladin, rubbing his face against Dan's knee. I'll tell you the rest of the plot later," Dan whispered to the Mau.”

“Hello," She said.There was a long silence."Hello," said Artemis again."Are you talking to me?" said the tree. It had a faint Australian accent."Yes," said Artemis. "I am Artemis." If the tree experienced any recognition, it didn't show it. "I'm the goddess of hunting and chastity," said Artemis.Another silence. The the tree said, "I'm Kate. I work in mergers and acquisitions for Goldman Sachs.""Do you know what happened to you, Kate?" said Artemis.The longest silence of all. Artemis was just about to repeat the question when the tree replied."I think I've turned into a tree," it said. "Yes," said Artemis. "You have.""Thank God for that," said the tree. "I thought I was going mad."Then the tree seemed to reconsider this. "Actually," it said, "I think I would rather be mad." Then, with hope in its voice: "Are you sure I haven't gone mad?""I'm sure," said Artemis. "You're a tree. A eucalyptus. Subgenus of mallee. Variegated leaves.""Oh," said the tree."Sorry," said Artemis."But with variegated leaves?""Yes," said Artemis. "Green and Yellow."The tree seemed pleased. "Oh well, there's that to be grateful for," it said.”

“It's a token for the arcade games at Laser Sport Time!" Dan hissed."Uncle Alistair doesn't think so," Amy murmured. "He's a numismatist.""He takes his clothes off in public?" Dan said.”

“I'm going to hang up now," she said quietly."Fine.""Good-bye, Ian," she said.He paused again. She thought she heard something like a sniff or a choke, but it was probably the sound of him tearing up his plane ticket. "Good-bye, Amy."She hung up the phone: Dan and Nellie were quiet."Well, think about it," said Dan. "Did you really want Natalie Kabra as a sister-in-law?”

“I'm throwing out this bottle rocket.""No, wait!" Dan said, reaching for it. "It hasn't been set off yet. Don't waste it, Amy. And we don't have company coming—we have Ian Kabra coming. And I know you want to totally impress him and take him to the movies and stare dreamily into his eyes—""I do not," Amy said, too quickly."Oh, Ian," Dan said, pressing his lightsaber to his chest and batting his eyes. "Tell me again about your shiny, shiny shoes.”

“My dear children!"Nellie whopped him upside the head with her backpack."Ow!" Uncle Alistair curled over, cupping his hand over his good eye."Nellie!" Amy said."Sorry," Nellie muttered. "I thought he was one of the bad guys.”