“You'll be boarding the nine twenty-one commercial flight as Shirley and Roderick Cliphorn.""Roderick Cliphorn?" Dan groaned. Only someone with a name like Sinead Starling would have considered that normal.”

“Global warming doesn't care what's in your bank account."-Sinead Starling”

“That's weak! You don't know what caring is... Caring is love. And love fights! Love doesn't look for the path of least resistance. Hell's bells, Roderick, if love was that easy everyone would have it. You're a coward!”

“He will lunch with you at your flat tomorrow at one-thirty. Please remember that he drinks no wine, strongly disapproves of smoking, and can only eat the simplest food, owing to an impaired digestion. Do not offer him coffee, for he considers it the root of half the nerve-trouble in the world.""I should think a dog-biscuit and a glass of water would about meet the case, what?""Bertie!""Oh, all right. Merely persiflage.""Now it is precisely that sort of idiotic remark that would be calculated to arouse Sir Roderick's worst suspicions.”

“I tried eHarmony, because I liked the white hair and glasses of that guy on the commercials, and his manner was gentle, but eHarmony told me that the system and it's twenty nine levels of compatibility couldn't find anyone for me.That hurt my feelings.”

“You can only call someone crazy if there’s someone else who’s normal. Like good and evil. If everything was good, then nothing would be good.”