“A girl who bonnets a policeman with an ashcan full of bottles is obviously good wife-and-mother timber.”

“This was not Aunt Dahlia, my good and kindly aunt, but my Aunt Agatha, the one who chews broken bottles and kills rats with her teeth.”

“Whenever I get that sad, depressed feeling, I go out and kill a policeman.”

“Freddie experienced the sort of abysmal soul-sadness which afflicts one of Tolstoy's Russian peasants when, after putting in a heavy day's work strangling his father, beating his wife, and dropping the baby into the city's reservoir, he turns to the cupboards, only to find the vodka bottle empty.”

“No wonder Freddie experienced the sort of abysmal soul-sadness which afflicts one of Tolstoi's Russian peasants when, after putting in a heavy day's work strangling his father, beating his wife, and dropping the baby into the city reservoir, he turns to the cupboard, only to find the vodka bottle empty.”

“Birds, except when broiled and in the society of a cold bottle, bored him stiff.”

“And she's got brains enough for two, which is the exact quantity the girl who marries you will need.”