“Providence looks after all the chumps of this world, and personally, I'm all for it.”

“Providence seems to look after the chumps of this world; and, personally, I'm all for it.”

“Chumps always make the best husbands. When you marry, Sally, grab a chump. Tap his head first, and if it rings solid, don't hesitate. All the unhappy marriages come from husbands having brains. What good are brains to a man? They only unsettle him.”

“I had one of those ideas I do sometimes get, though admittedly a chump of the premier class.”

“It was one of those parties where you cough twice before you speak and then decide not to say it after all.”

“I've found, as a general rule of life, that the things you think are going to be the scaliest nearly always turn out not so bad after all.”

“Just another proof, of course, of what I often say - it takes all sorts to make a world.”