“You see, the journey of life is a wondrous thing. There are no maps, and no rest stops. You follow the signs as best you can, and suddenly you’re there. Wherever you are, that is.”

“After all, the best alibi is not the word of a friend, he knew, but the testimony of an enemy.”

“THE GHOULS ON THE BUS GO ROUND AND ROUND, ROUND AND ROUND, ROUND AND ROUND. THE GHOULS ON THE BUS GO ROUND AND ROUND, ALL OVER TOWN!”

“Adults have an amazing capacity to suck the joy out of such noble pursuits as Reading and Writing until they resemble their favorite pastimes: Working and Suffering.”

“The proper behaviour all through the holiday season is to be drunk. The drunkenness culminates on New Years’ Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you’re married to.”

“Everyone with any sense and experience in life would rather take his fellows one by one than in a crowd. Crowds are noisy, unreasonable and impatient. They can trample you easier than a single person can. And a crowd will never buy you lunch.”

“If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free.”