“Being dead is highly overrated. It’s no fun at all." -- Mythe: A Fairy Tale”

“Making fun of born-again Christians is like hunting dairy cows with a high powered rifle and scope.”

“One of the problems with being a writer is that all of your idiocies are still in print somewhere. I strongly support paper recycling.”

“A walk through an old graveyard shows our ancestors often had more dead children than we have live ones.”

“It’s important to understand that in the Third World most driving is done with the horn, or “Egyptian Brake Pedal,” as it is known. There is a precise and complicated etiquette of horn use. Honk your horn only under the following circumstances:1. When anything blocks the road2. When anything doesn’t.3. When anything might.4. At red lights5. At green lights.6. At all other times.”

“No one has ever had a fantasy about being tied to a bed and sexually ravished by someone dressed as a liberal”

“When Adam Smith was being incomprehensible he didn’t have the luxury of brief, snappy technical terms as a shorthand for incoherence.”