“There is nothing like desire for preventing the things one says from bearing any resemblance to what one has in one's mind.”

“Uh-oh! BEWARE!!!" said Fensler. "Never, ever marry the best sex of your life. It only happens with someone who is very dangerous for you. It's passionate, exciting, but it generally indicates that you are pushing each other's dysfunctional buttons. Be very wary of men you are crazily sexually attracted to-they're the dangerous ones for you. That's what all analysis says in one form or another.”

“If you only get hypoglycemia around one person, the chances are actually much greater that you might be falling in love than that you have suddenly contracted a nasty sugar condition.”

“You know you've checked into Heartbreak Hotel for real when you feel less desirable than uncooked fish.”

“I always say, waste not, want not, which is a terrible cliche the British invented during the war to get kids to eat their whole-wheat bread, but when I say it I mean, waste not money on boring old rent when it can be un-wasted on Chloe jeans.”

“It's chic to be shy.”

“Some doctors say a person who has only had same-sex attractions is, like, a zero. A person who has only had opposite-sex attractions is, like, a ten. He says most people fall between one and nine.”