“I'm a vampire, idiot. I don't have x-ray vision." "Some supernatural monster you are, remind me to trade you in for a werewolf, bro. Probably be more useful right now.”

“So, been attacked by any vampires yet?""Not one.""Zombies? Giant spiders? Water monsters?"It's been really quiet on the supernatural front""Too bad, 'cause I got attacked by a devil dog. It was not awesome.”

“And I am not finished," I promised. "Tell me where to find the child.""F*** you!""I'm not attracted to you," I said. "But if by that you mean you won't help me, then I have no use for you.”

“I'm a vampire. I have secret powers".."Actually, your mom let me in" -Michael Glass”

“I’m faster than the rest of you, if .. Because I’m a vampire,” Michael said, and it was some kind of breakthrough for him to say that. “If you get in trouble, I’ll be there.”“Nice,” Shane said. “I’m warming up to this bloodsucking thing, Mikey.”“No, you’re not.”“Okay, no, I’m not, but right now let’s pretend I am.”

“Hang on - Slow down. I'm not going anywhere. You know that, right? You don't have to put out to keep me here. Well, as long as you eventually..." Shane said."Shut up" Claire said.”

“Shane talking to Claire - "Hang on - Slow down. I'm not going anywhere. You know that, right? You don't have to put out to keep me here. Well, as long as you eventually...""Shut up" Claire said.”