“Seriously,” Shane said, “this kind of is the worst situation we’ve ever been in, right?”“Speak for yourself,” Michael said. “I got myself killed last year. Twice.”“Oh yeah. You’re right—last year really sucked for you.”

“I’d kiss you, too, if I was closer.”(claire)“I wouldn’t,” Michael said. “I don’t love you that way.”“That’s not what you said last time.”(shane)“Ass.”(michael)_________________________“No,” Shane said. “I’m not leaving you two here alone. We stick together.”“I’m still not kissing you,” Michael said.“Tease.”

“As he filled the mug with coffee, Michael waited for Shane to make some sense. Which Shane finally did, holding up the cheaply printed white flyer. It curled around the edges from where it had been rolled up to fit in the mailbox. “What have I always wanted in this town?” he asked. “A strip club that would let in fifteen year olds?” Michael said.“When I was fifteen. No, seriously, what?”“Guns ‘R Us?”Shane made a harsh buzzer sound. “Okay, to be fair, yeah, that’s a good alternate answer. But no. I always wanted a place to seriously train to fight, right? Someplace that didn't think aerobics was a martial art? And look!”

“I’m faster than the rest of you, if .. Because I’m a vampire,” Michael said, and it was some kind of breakthrough for him to say that. “If you get in trouble, I’ll be there.”“Nice,” Shane said. “I’m warming up to this bloodsucking thing, Mikey.”“No, you’re not.”“Okay, no, I’m not, but right now let’s pretend I am.”

“Anybody else think that was weird?' Shane asked as they got into the car. Eve sent him an exasperated glance; the three of them were, of course, in the backseat. Amelie had the front, with Michael.'Ya think? In general, or in particular?''Weird that we got through the entire thing, and I didn’t have to hit anybody.'There was a moment of silence. Michael said, as he started the car, 'You’re right, Shane. That is strange.”

“Seriously, Shane? Ditto? That's the best you can do?"Shane and Michael exchanged identical looks and shrugs. Guys."Let me show you idiots how it's done," Eve said, and hugged Claire fiercely. She kissed her on the cheek. "I love you, CB. Please take care of yourself, okay?""I love you, too," Claire said, and suddenly her throat felt tight and her eyes burned with tears. "I really do."Shane and Michael watched them with identical expressions of blank bemusement, and finally Shane said, "So basically, it's what I said. Ditto.”