“Unfortunately, my army consists of one unreliable criminal, one girl with adisability, and one incredibly foolish young vampire with a tanning issue. I am not confident.”

“Silly…but the mere issuing of a command always inspires confidence. It doesn't matter whether it is a necessary command, or even a correct one…it inspires self-confidence even in the man who issues it.”

“I am young, I am twenty years old; yet I know nothing of life but despair, death, fear, and fatuous superficiality cast over an abyss of sorrow. I see how peoples are set against one another, and in silence, unknowingly, foolishly, obediently, innocently slay one another.”

“Bookishness, an unfortunate trait for a girl, especially one who is not nice to look at.”

“You are unreliable, Flavia,' he said. 'Utterly unreliable.'Of course I was! It was one of the things I loved most about myself.”

“You're the most annoying girl on the planet. You make me want to throw myself off a bridge. And, unfortunately, I am one hundred percent, head-over-heels, crazy in love with you.”