“She was around fifty, with dark blond hair that had been twisted, teased, and probably threatened into a complicated updo.”

“I bet she woke up with her hair looking like something out of a Pantene commercial while little bluebirds circled around her head, and raccoons brought her breakfast or something.”

“Somehow, my whole existence had become a really complicated word problem. I'd always sucked at those.”

“In fact, there was an ancient bearded guy in the corner who looked like he'd probably palled around with Mary Shelley.”

“I wondered if they had rehearsed this weird three-way-talking thing they had going on. I imagined them sitting in a circle in their dorm room, brushing their hair and saying, "Okay, so I'll say we feel bad, and then you'll say that your hot boyfriend thinks she's pathetic.”

“The sun was just beginning to rise when we reached the corn mill, which surprised me until I remembered that A) England has freakishly early sunrises in the summer, and B) we'd been gone nearly two hours. I was pretty sure I'd never been so wiped out in my entire life. I felt hollow and exhausted, and as I looked at Archer, almost unbearably sad. I tried to tell myself that it was just because I'd been nearly squished by the space-time continuum,but I knew that wasn't it.I think Archer was feeling something similar, because his hands shook slightly as he lifted the chain from around our necks. It hit the floor with a heavy thump, sending up a cloud of dust motes. They sparkled in the shaft of pale pink light that fell between us, looking surprisingly pretty for dirt.Archer's face was streaked with sweat, and there was a smudge above his left eyebrow, as well as a dark stain on his torso that was probably ghoul blood. I had a feeling I looked just as rough."Well," he said at last, his voice slightly hoarse. "That was the worst first date I've ever been on.”

“When someone tells you somebody’s been murdered, laughing is probably not the best response. You know, for future reference.But laughing is exactly what I did.”