“This thing with us is the only real thing I've had in a long time. You're the only real thing." He raised our hands and kissed my knuckles. "And I'm done pretending I don't want you.”

“Oh,Mercer," he murmured against my temple once we'd come up for air, "we are so screwed."I pressed my face against his neck, breathing him in. "I know.""So what do we do?"Reluctantly, I tried to move away. It was hard to think when he was so close to me. "If we were good people, we'd never see each other again."His arms locked around my waist, pulling me back. "Okay,well, that's not happening. Plan B?"I smiled up at him, feeling ridiculously giddy for someone on the verge of ruining her life. "I don't have one.You?"He shook his head. "Nothing.But...look. I've spent basically my whole life pretending to be someone I'm not, faking some feelings, hiding others." Reaching down, he clasped my hand and lifted it so that our joined hands were trapped between our chests. "This thing with us is the only real thing I've had in a long time.You're the only real thing." He raised our hands and kissed my knuckles. "And I'm done pretending I don't want you."I had read a lot about swooning in the romance novels Mom had tried to hide from me,but I'd never felt in danger of doing it until now. Which was why a snarky comment was definitely called for."Wow,Cross.I think you missed your calling.Screw demon hunting: you should clearly be writing Hallmark cards."His face broke into that crooked grin that was maybe my favorite sight in the whole world. "Shut up," he muttered before lowering his head and kissing me again."Why is it," I said against his lips several moments later, "that we're always kissing in gross, dirty places like cellars and abandoned mills?"He laughed, pressing kisses to my jaw, then my neck. "Next time it'll be a castle, I promise.This is England, after all. Can't be too hard to find one.”

“you feel things real strong, leanne, even if you pretend you don't. you're my girl that way. ”

“I'm biding my time until my real life kicks in.""How will you know when that happens?""It will be when I no longer have a list of things I've never done.”

“It was tempting to fall back on reliable tactics and pretend things were…perfect. To pretend he was only a boy and I was only a girl and we desired each other. I wanted him to hold and kiss me and pretend he would do anything to protect me. I wanted to pretend he felt a fraction of the things I couldn’t seem to stop myself from feeling for him. My heart hurt. As much as my shoulder and ribs screamed with pain, they were eclipsed by the sorrow in my heart. I couldn’t pretend anymore. The time for it had passed; there was only the reality of things left to deal with. ”

“Ethan and I are done," I said finally."I'm sorry.""He was my first boyfriend.""I know.""The only real boyfriend I've had. I'm a senior in high school and he was my only real boyfriend.""I know.""And I won't find another one at Jones Hall. That is guaranteed.""Okay.""This is all very sad and tragic," I said.Alan unwrapped a sleeve of Smarties. "Yet, oddly, you don't seem that upset.""I know.”