“I smashed his hand as hard as I could with the Wiffle bat."Ow!" he screamed.Carson was rubbing his red palm, inspecting it for damage. "That hurt," he shrieked. "You really hurt me.""Right back at you," I said. "Good-bye Carson."He frowned, massaging his hand, the big baby. "I just wanted to end this nicely.""Yeah?" I cocked the bat up to hit him again. "Well, this time you don't get what you want.”

“You planning top kill me with a Wiffle bat?" [Carson asked]"Yeah.""Why?" he asked.The bat was shaking in my tight grip. "Because I don't have my Minnie Mouse pillow.”

“In the evening they went to say good-bye to Bilbo. 'Well, if you must go, you must,' he said. 'I am sorry. I shall miss you. It is nice just to know that you are about the place. But I am getting very sleepy.' Then he gave Frodo his mithril-coat and Sting, forgetting that he had already done so; and he gave him also three books of lore that he had made at various times, written in his spidery hand, and labelled on their red backs: Translations from the Elvish, by B. B.”

“Do you think we're being robbed?" I whispered.He nodded gravely, then crawled over to my closet and opened it."Did you want to borrow something more formal to wear for the robbery? I'm not sure I have anything in your size.""Shh," he whispered. "Don't you at least have a tennis racket or anything?""You think they came here looking for a doubles partner?"He turned quickly and gave me a look, then whipped a Wiffle bat out of the mess."Wow," I said. "You jock-type people really are single-minded, aren't you? Uh-oh, we're being robbed. Let's play ball!""It's for a weapon," Carson whispered."You're gonna hit them with a Wiffle bat?""What else you got?""Um...A pillow""Exactly" ... "Stay behind me," he whispered."Can I just say that I never knew this about me before, but weirdly enough this whole protective he-man thing actually turns me on.""Josie.""What," I asked."Shut Up."I grabbed my pillow, just in case, so to speak, and tiptoed behind him around the mussed-up bed. "Maybe we should just hide in the closet."He turned around, rolled his eyes and kissed me. "Shh," he repeated.”

“I don't want him hurt because he got out of hand with me.""Yet you would have shot him."I shrugged. "I never said I was consistent, just serious.”

“You're making this really hard for me," he said quietly, holding my face in his hands."So maybe you should give in.""I don't want you to think that's all I want from you.""What else do you want from me?""Everything," he whispered and brushed his lips against mine.”