“Most humans are unaware that amidst the Anne Rice devotees and the vampire wannabes, actual vampires use the Net.”

“For cripes sake, have you ever heard of 'Ready or not? Here I come'?"Retro or not, cheesy is cheesy."Sometimes what you learned from beer commercials comes in real handy.”

“There are vampires. They are real, they are of our time, and they are here, close by, stalking us as we sleep...”

“Want to know something wonderful? Even when we at times are faithless Jesus remains faithful. ”

“Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos!”

“The only vampires I've ever seen are the Goths trying to get a glimpse of Anne Rice's house, who drink strawberry sodas and tell each other it's blood.”

“Don't spend all of your time trying to be like someone else because you can never be them and they can never be you. ”