“A BoatO beautifulwas the werewolfin his evil forest.We took himto the carnivaland he startedcryingwhen he sawthe Ferris wheel.Electricgreen and red tearsflowed downhis furry cheeks.He lookedlike a boatout on the darkwater.”

“The old woman had an old dog, but he hardly counted any more. He was so old that he looked like a stuffed dog. Once I took him for a walk down to the store. It was just like taking a stuffed dog for a walk. I tied him up to a stuffed fire hydrant and he pissed on it, but it was only stuffed piss.”

“He created his own Kool Aid reality and was able to illuminate himself by it.”

“Once upon a time there was a dwarf knight who only had fifty words to live in and they were so fleeting that he only had time to put on a suit of armor and ride swiftly on a black horse into a very well-lit woods where he vanished forever.”

“He learned about life at sixteen, first from Dostoevsky and then from the whores of New Orleans.”

“The only thing he likes better than a nice juicy homicide is a sirloin steak smothered with onions.”

“The smallest snowstorm on record took place an hour ago in my back yard. It was approximately two flakes. I waited for more to fall, but that was it. The entire storm was two flakes.”