“Twenty percent? What am I, your waiter? I got you five vampires, not a BLT.”

“Let me make sure I have this straight. The cavalry just now rode into town and it's a Czech Gypsy porn-star zombie killer. Have I got that right?”

“See? Even dead she makes me a better whatever-the-hell it is I am. A less stupid person. A more considerate monster.”

“You're quite the humanitarian. By the way, thanks a fuck of a lot for leaving me off your who-to-save list.You're on it, Alfredo Garcia. I just didn't want to say it out loud and have you call me Nancy or Tinker Bell.Yeah, I would have done that.”

“*For eleven years, I've been worked over and abused in ways you can't imagine by things you don't want to know about. I've killed every kind of vile, black-souled, dead-eyed nightmare that ever made you piss your pjs and cry for mommy in the middle of the night. I kill monsters and, if I wanted, I could say a word and burn you to powder from the inside out. I can tear any human you ever met to rages with my bare hands. Give me one good reason why I could possibly need you?*She looks straight at me, not blinking. No fear in her eyes.*Because you might be the Tasmanian Devil and the Angel of Death all rolled into one, but you don't even know how to get a phone.*I hate to admit it, but she has a point.”

“Did I hurt your feelings again? Sorry. When this is all over I'll send some flowers to your inner child.”

“I guarantee you I'm not going to forget your voice. We're going to run into each other down the road sometime, and when we do I'm going to pop you apart one rivet at a time.""There's the monster. Hello, monster.”