“Frozen yogurt is tastier than ice cream; nobody is too old for cartoons; bald men are sexy; chocolate is the best medicine; BIG books are better; cats secretly rule the planet; and everything should be available in the color pink, including monster trucks.”

“BIG books are better.  There, I said it and it's true. ”

“Of Woman and Chocolate "Chocolate shares both the bitter and the sweet.Chocolate melts away all cares, coating the heart while smothering every last ache.  Chocolate brings a smile to the lips on contact, leaving a dark kiss behind.  Chocolate is amiable, complimenting any pairing; berries, peanut butter, pretzels, mint, pastries, drinks...everything goes with chocolate.  The very thought of chocolate awakens taste buds, sparking memories of candy-coated happiness.  Chocolate will go nuts with you, no questions asked.  Chocolate craves your lips, melts at your touch, and savors the moment.  Chocolate is that dark and beautiful knight who charges in on his gallant steed ready to slay dragons when needed.  Chocolate never disappoints; it leaves its lover wanting more.  Chocolate is the ultimate satisfaction, synonymous with perfection.  Chocolate is rich, smooth pleasure.  Chocolate has finesse - the charm to seduce and indulge at any time, day or night.  Chocolate is a true friend, a trusted confidant, and faithful lover. Chocolate warms and comforts and sympathizes.  Chocolate holds power over depression, victory over disappointment.  Chocolate savvies the needs of a woman and owns her.   Simply put, chocolate is paradise.”

“Monsters excite us in this way or that.They make our pulse thrum and steal lives from the cat!They're frightening creatures, one peek and you'll see.Yet life without monsters, how dull it would be.Your tense, nervous laugh tells me you disagree?”

“I finally figured out the big, elusive secret to weight loss. Don't eat! Who knew?”

“Statistics, likelihoods, and probabilities mean everything to men, nothing to God.”

“Happiness doesn't always come in pink. Learn to appreciate the rainbow.”