“When you open your mouth, listeners are offended.  When you close your mouth, the expectant are offended.  If a person seeks misdoing from you they will find it regardless of whether or not you deliver. ”

“Christmas is like candy; it slowly melts in your mouth sweetening every taste bud, making you wish it could last forever.”

“What's the point of changing who you are in order to impress a woman, when your intention is to return to who you were, a person she was never attracted to in the first place?”

“Funny thing how when you reach out, people tend to reach right back. Best, then, to make sure your hand is open and not fisted.”

“There's enchantment in a smile, did you know?Shall I prove in a wink that it is so?Watch my mouth grin wide and see,How quick your lips smile back at me!”

“Prayer:  The act of falling to your knees in pleading fashion, seeking help from a greater power than all else to have failed you previously.”

“Closing your eyes won't make the awfulness go away. It may be that nothing will. But dwelling on it, dreading the evil, playing out the misery in your head - doesn't this feed the monster? You can't close your eyes to life, but you can choose where your gaze lingers.”