“I tentatively attempted to make contact with the muscles in my body. They told me to leave them the fuck alone.”

“I just told you to be quiet. That's one step away from asking you to wash my laundry and make me a sandwich.”

“I don't suppose that she gave you the job based on looks alone?"Adrian had been staring off but now flashed me a big smile. "Why, Sage, you sweet talker.""That's not what I meant! What happened?"He shrugged. "I told the truth.""Adrian!""I'm serious. She asked me what my greatest strength was. I said getting along with people.""That's not bad." I admitted."Then she asked what my greatest weakness was. And I said, 'Where should I start?'""Adrian!""Stop saying my name like that. I told her the truth. By the time I was on the fourth one, she told me I could go.”

“I don't suppose," I said, once we were in the car, "that she just gave you the job based on looks alone?" Adrian had been staring off but now flashed me a big smile. "Why, Sage, you sweet talker." "Thats not what I meant! What happened?" He shrugged. "I told the truth." "Adrian!" "I'm serious. She asked me what my greatest strength was. I said getting along with people." "Thats not bad," I admitted. "Then she asked what my greatest weakness was. And I said, 'Where should I start?'" "Adrian!" "Stop saying my name like that. I told her the truth. By the time I was on the fourth one, she told me I could go.”

“With no more ammunition, I resorted to old stanbys."That," I told Tatiana," is the most fucked up law I've ever heard”

“This dress makes me look fat," I told Jasmine as we stood near the back of the crowd and watched the last minute preperations fall into place. She glanced over at me and my efforts to rearrange the folds of my long, gauzy dress."Your pregnant," she stated. "Everything's supposed to make you look fat."I Scowled. "I think the correct reponse was 'No it doesn't.”

“I'm serious. She asked me what my greatest strength was. I said getting along with people.""That's not bad," I admitted."Then she asked what my greatest weakness was. And I said, 'Where should I start?""Adrian!""Stop saying my name like that. I told her the truth. By the time I was on the fourth one, she told me I could go."I groaned and resisted the urge to beat my head on the steering wheel.”