“Hades raised an eyebrow. When he sat forward in his throne, shadowy faces appeared in the folds of his black robes, faces of torment,as if the garment was stitched of trapped souls from the Fields of Punishment, trying to get out. The ADHD part of me wondered, off-task, whether the rest of his clothes were made the same way. What horrible things would you have to do in your life to get woven into Hades' underwear?”

“What horrible things would you have to do in your life to get woven into Hades' underwear?”

“She said this in the same way you might say Fields of Punishment or Hades's gym shorts.”

“Nico strode forward. The enemy army fell back before him like he radiated death, which of course he did.Through the face guard of his skull-shaped helmet, he smiled. "Got your message. Is it too late to join the party?""Son of Hades." Kronos spit on the ground. "Do you love death so much you wish to experience it?""Your death," Nico said, "would be great for me.""I'm immortal, you fool! I have escaped Tartarus. You have no business here, and no chance to live."Nico drew his sword-three feet of wicked sharp Stygian iron, black as a nightmare. "I don't agree.”

“Hades smiled coldly. "Hello, Father. You're looking...young.""Hades," Kronos growled. "I hope you and the ladies have come to pledge your allegiance.""I'm afraid not." Hades sighed. "My son here convinced me that perhaps I should prioritize my list of enemies." He glanced at me with distaste. "As much as I dislike certain upstart demigods, it would not do for Olympus to fall. I would miss bickering with my siblings. And if there is one thing we agree on - it is that you were a TERRIBLE father.”

“Hades," Kronos growled. "I hope you and the ladies have come to pledge your allegiance." "I'm afraid not." Hades sighed. "My son here convinced me that perhaps I should prioritize my list of enemies." He glanced at me with distaste. "As much as I dislike certainupstart demigods, it would not do for Olympus to fall. I would miss bickering with my siblings. And if there is one thing we agree on—it is that you were a TERRIBLE father.”

“The older lady harrumphed. "I warned you, daughter. This scoundrel Hades is no good. You could've married the god of doctors or the god of lawyers, but noooo. You had to eat the pomegranate.""Mother-""And get stuck in the Underworld!""Mother, please-""And here it is August, and do you come home like you're supposed to? Do you ever think about your poor lonely mother?""DEMETER!" Hades shouted. "That is enough. You are a guest in my house.""Oh, a house is it?" she said. "You call this dump a house? Make my daughter live in this dark, damp-""I told you," Hades said, grinding his teeth, "there's a war in the world above. You and Persephone are better off here with me.""Excuse me," I broke in. "But if you're going to kill me, could you just get on with it?”