“Have you any idea how much my kingdom has swollen in this past century alone, how many subdivisions I've had to open?"I opened my mouth to respond, but Hades was on a roll now.More security ghouls," he moaned. "Traffic problems at the judgment pavilion. Double overtime for the staff. I used to be a rich god, Percy Jackson. I control all the precious metals under the earth. But my expenses!"Charon wants a pay raise," I blurted, just remembering the fact. As soon as I said it, I wished I could sew up my mouth.Don't get me started on Charon!" Hades yelled. "He's been impossible ever since he discovered Italian suits! Problems everywhere, and I've got to handle all of them personally. The commute time alone from the palace to the gates is enough to drive me insane! And the dead just keep arriving. No, godling. I need no help getting subjects! I did not ask for this war.”

“Oh no." I said panic rising in my chest. "No, no, no, Somebody get a can opener. I've got a god in my head!!”

“The Council agrees," Zeus said. "Percy Jackson, you will have one gift from the gods."I hesitated. "Any gift?"Zeus nodded grimly. "I know what you will ask. The greatest gift of all. Yes, if you want it, it shall be yours. The gods have not bestowed this gift on a mortal hero in many centuries, but, Perseus Jackson-if you wish it-you shall be made a god. Immortal. Undying. You shall serve as your father's lieutenant for all time."I stared at him, stunned. "Um...a god?"Zeus rolled his eyes. "A dimwitted god, apparently. But yes. With the consensus of the entire Council, I can make you immortal. Then I will have to put up with you forever.""Hmm," Ares mused. "That means I can smash him to a pulp as often as I want, and he'll just keep coming back for more. I like this idea.”

“The older lady harrumphed. "I warned you, daughter. This scoundrel Hades is no good. You could've married the god of doctors or the god of lawyers, but noooo. You had to eat the pomegranate.""Mother-""And get stuck in the Underworld!""Mother, please-""And here it is August, and do you come home like you're supposed to? Do you ever think about your poor lonely mother?""DEMETER!" Hades shouted. "That is enough. You are a guest in my house.""Oh, a house is it?" she said. "You call this dump a house? Make my daughter live in this dark, damp-""I told you," Hades said, grinding his teeth, "there's a war in the world above. You and Persephone are better off here with me.""Excuse me," I broke in. "But if you're going to kill me, could you just get on with it?”

“Percy Jackson," Hermes said, "because you have taken on the curse of Achilles, I must spare you. You are in the hands of the Fates now. But you will never speak to me like that again. You have no idea how much I have sacrificed, how much—"His voice broke, and he shrank back to human size. "My son, my greatest pride . . . my poor May . . ."He sounded so devastated I didn't know what to say. One minute he was ready to vaporize us. Now he looked like he needed a hug.”

“Is Tyson okay?" I asked.The question seemed to take my dad by surprise. He's fine. Doing much better than I expected. Though "peanut butter" is a strange battle cry."You let him fight?"Stop changing the subject! You realize what you are asking me to do? My palace will be destroyed."And Olympus might be saved."Do you have any idea how long I've worked on remodeling this palace? The game room alone took six hundred years."Dad—"Very well! It shall be as you say. But my son, pray this works."I am praying. I'm talking to you, right?"Oh . . . yes. Good point.”

“We need music," Nico said. "How's your singing?""Um, no. Can't you just, like, tell it to open? You're the son of Hades and all.""It's not so easy. We need music."I was pretty sure if I tried to sing, all I would cause was an avalanche.”