“If people really want to ward off the undead, why don't they hang anchovies instead of garlic? I mean, seriously, is there anything more off-putting than those creepy little fish?~Cáel van Court to Damien Beck”

“I mean, I'm not antisocial or anything, but I sometimes don't see the point of hanging out with a whole bunch of people at a party if all you really want to do is hang out with just one person.”

“I don't know why, but it didn't seem an option for more than one of us to storm off, and I wanted to make sure that one was me.”

“I know I'm an acquired taste - I'm anchovies. And not everybody wants those hairy little things.”

“People say: "Don't bite off more than you can chew."I say: "Bite off and chew madly!”

“That anyone would want to be famous still mystified Colin. As TV had trained him to do, he associated the word with divorces and court appearances and rehab and jail time. He knew more than he wanted about all of those except rehab, and that was the one famous people blew off anyway.”