“Oh, you have to charge 'em, Jubal. The marks won't pay attention if it's free.”

“I don't pay much attention to politics.""You should. It's barely less important than your own heart beat.”

“Random chance is not sufficient to explain random chance. ~Jubal Harshaw”

“If God existed (a question concerning which Jubal maintained a meticulous intellectual neutrality) and if He desired to be worshiped (a proposition which Jubal found inherently improbable but conceivably possible in the dim light of his own ignorance), then (stipulating affirmatively both the above) it nevertheless seemed wildly unlikely to Jubal to the point of reductio ad absurdum that a God potent to shape galaxies would be titillated and swayed by the whoop-te-do nonsense the Fosterites offered Him as "worship.”

“The Universe was a damned silly place at best . . . but the least likely explanation for its existence was the no-explanation of random chance, the conceit that some abstract somethings "just happened" to be some atoms that "just happened" to get together in configurations which "just happened" to look like consistent laws and then some of these configurations "just happened" to possess self-awareness and that two such "just happened" to be the Man from Mars and the other a bald-headed old coot with Jubal himself inside. No, Jubal would not buy the "just happened" theory, popular as it was with men who called themselves scientists. Random chance was not a sufficient explanation of the Universe--in fact, random chance was not sufficient to explain random chance; the pot could not hold itself.”

“Jill: 'I don't pay attention to politics.'Ben: 'You should. It's barely less important than your own heart beat.'Jill: 'I don't pay attention to that, either.”

“God made alcohol and he made feet - and he made 'em so you could put 'em together and be happy!”