“Women talk when they want to. Or don't.”

“Talking with a Martian is something like talking with an echo. You don't get any argument but you don't get results either.”

“The correct way to punctuate a sentence that states: "Of course it is none of my business, but -- " is to place a period after the word "but." Don't use excessive force in supplying such a moron with a period. Cutting his throat is only a momentary pleasure and is bound to get you talked about.”

“I never do anything I don't want to do. Nor does anyone, but in my case I am always aware of it.”

“God created men to test the souls of women.”

“Girls are simply wonderful. Just to stand on a corner and watch them going past is delightful. They don't walk. At least not what we do when we walk. I don't know how to describe it, but it's much more complex and utterly delightful. They don't move just their feet; everything moves and in different directions . . . and all of it graceful.”

“Once a month, some women act like men act all the time.”