“Never attempt to teach a pig to sing; it wastes your time and annoys the pig.”

“When one teaches, two learn.”

“What are the facts? Again and again and again – what are the facts? Shun wishful thinking, ignore divine revelation, forget what “the stars foretell,” avoid opinion, care not what the neighbors think, never mind the unguessable “verdict of history” – what are the facts, and to how many decimal places? You pilot always into an unknown future; facts are your single clue. Get the facts!”

“Yield to temptation...it may not pass your way again!”

“The first principle of freedom is the right to go to hell in your own handbasket.”

“Writing is not necessarily something to be ashamed of, but do it in private and wash your hands afterwards.”

“A pig painted gold is still a pig.”