“What a goon, except it really is funny, me trying to sneeze a hot dog through my nose, and we're both laughing like total morons.”

“I might appear confident and chatty, but I spend most of my time laughing at jokes I don't find funny, saying things I don't really mean - because at the end of the day that's what we're all trying to do: fit in, one way or another, desperately trying to pretend we're all the same.”

“I angle my head down and peer up at him through my lashes in what I hope is an alluring manner. I have zero experience in this area though, so it’s possible I look like a total moron.”

“Dogs are exceptionally intelligent creatures. My dog, for example, taught me that not only am I a cat person, but that it isn’t really a dog at all, but that it is in fact a cat.”

“Expel the object!" Freak shouts. "Regurgitate, you big moron!" and he gives me another thump and I cough up this yucky mess, but I'm still laughing so hard my nose is running.”

“We're not arguing about it, Shawn. We're staying."Shawn stared at her with narrowed eyes. Jasper burst out laughing. I elbowed him."What's so funny?""You. Both of you. Do they raise you to be like that? By the moons, I feel sorry for every man that lives over there!”