“Statements make sense for somebody who needs advice. I’m not giving advice. I don’t instruct. At my best, I delight. That’s my job.”

“My advice is don’t take advice from anybody. This is good advice, and as such, it’s bad advice.”

“Listen, I’m going to give you some advice, not because Ithink you need it, but because I feel like I’ve earned it. The right, I mean. To give advice. Here it is:don’t hold onto things. It’s a problem the men in my family have. It’s taken me a long time to figurethis out. Me, my father, my grandfather, we collect things. We collect miseries. It’s what we do. Butsometimes the best thing to do is to just let things go. To let them pass.”

“me giving my mom romantic advice is kind of like a goldfish giving a snail advice on how to fly.” -Will Grayson (pg. 66)”

“That’s amazing. You’re five years younger than me and you’re the one giving me the much-needed advice. Thank you.”“Yeah, well in all honesty, I just pulled most that stuff out of my ass. But still, you’re welcome.”

“I wish to God that you had as much pleasure in following my advice, as I have in giving it to you. ”