“I've never been able to understand why a Republican contributor is a 'fat cat' and a Democratic contributor of the same amount of money is a 'public-spirited philanthropist'.”

“Republicans believe every day is the Fourth of July, but the democrats believe every day is April 15.”

“I've heard that hard work never killed anyone, but I say why take the chance?”

“Since I came to the White House, I've gotten two hearing aids, had a colon operation, a prostate operation, skin cancer, and I've been shot...damn thing is, I've never felt better.”

“Please tell me you're Republicans.”

“I've noticed that everyone who is for abortion has already been born.”

“Socialists ignore the side of man that is the spirit. They can provide you shelter, fill your belly with bacon and beans, treat you when you're ill, all the things guaranteed to a prisoner or a slave. They don't understand that we also dream.”