“Um. I’m really good at first aid. Like, the best.” He was the god of healing, after all. He’d better be good at fucking first aid!”

“Apollo. I’m the fucking Lord of the Underworld. Do you honestly think I need to get my jollies by lying to others? I can think of so many better things to do.”

“Sweetie,” Dino said, coming over to put his arm around her shoulder. He tipped her head up and looked into her eyes with great empathy. “You can’t fuck a statue. At least not at that angle. You’d at least have to tip it onto its back first, and as a conservator, I can’t recommend it.”

“He was frigging Dionysus! The man who invented the three-way! He’d had sex every possible way known to man. He’d made improvements to the Kama Sutra. And he was suffering from a major case of wet noodle.”

“Lord, she really hoped that was his penis and that Greek gods didn’t pad their briefs.”

“She opened one eye. “The goddess Artemis is going to talk to the supreme god Zeus … about me?” “Yup.” She closed her eyes again. “I’m so not okay.”

“Hopefully, he’ll be able to persuade Hades not to kill you. That wouldn’t be conducive to the start of a good relationship.”