“When my sons arrived in the family, their legal status was not ambiguous at all. They were our kids. But their wants and affections were still atrophied by a year in the orphanage. They didn't know that flies on their faces were bad. They didn't know that a strange man feeding them their first scary gulps of solid food wasn't a torturer. Life in the cribs alone must have seemed to them like freedom. That's what I was missing about the biblical doctrine of adoption. Sure it's glorious in the long run. But it sure seems like hell in the short run. . . .”

“Later, going home, I realized they didn't look alike at all; what made them seem to was the aftermath of stress and the lingering of sorrow. It's strange how pain marks our faces, and makes us look like family.”

“She wasn't sure who were family & who were friends, and maybe they all were both, and maybe it didn't matter one bit.”

“The first few years eamonn and I were together I wasn't sure I even liked him, let alone loved him.”

“New teachers were just a part of life, for a few days after one arrived, squawks of interest were emitted from various corners, but then they died away as the teacher was absorbed like everyone else...before you knew it, the fresh ones seemed to have been teaching there forever too, or else they didn't last very long, and were gone before you'd gotten to know them.”

“For me, the future was a complete paradox. One one hand [..] teachers were pushing that 'know what you want to do for the rest of your life' attitude. Yet, on the other hand I wanted to stay a kid. Parents and teachers were so intimidating when they talked about the 'real world' and taxes and mortgages and bills and insurance. With freedom comes responsibility and I wasn't sure if I was ready for all that.”